Five years ago, I hyperventilated at a car dealership.
See, big-ticket purchases had always been challenging for me.
Thankfully, I had tried-n-true practices I could use in the moment, to get me through that big day. When I felt myself getting overwhelmed, I went to the bathroom to do a Body Check-In. I gave myself some time and space to feel my feelings and calm down.
I also realized that, in order to make this big decision (whether or not to buy an electric Nissan Leaf), Forest and I needed to have a Money Date: right there in the middle of the car dealership. He agreed, and I guided us through a series of questions: how would this purchase affect our immediate cashflow, align with our values, affect our long-term money goals, etc.
Here’s the thing: that Body Check-In in the dealership bathroom calmed me down because I practiced it, regularly. And Forest and I were able to do a big, important Money Date on-the-fly like that because we’d already done so many Money Dates together.
Work your money practices regularly — and they’ll work for you when it counts.
A couple weeks ago, Forest and I found ourselves in that exact same car dealership. Our beloved Nissan Leaf (which we DID end up buying that day 5 years ago — full story here) had recently been rear-ended and deemed totaled. (Don’t worry, we were all fine!) But it was time to replace the car.
You might be wondering … did I hyperventilate again?
I am very happy to report: no, I did not! It was a completely different experience, this time around.
I felt calm, clear, and ready to make this purchase. Forest and I had already spent a few weeks researching pricing and features. We’d had Money Dates at home, discussing options. We’d visited the dealership three times to test drive cars and discuss financial details like extra taxes and warranties.
We left the dealership with an adorable, electric, retro-looking orange Fiat.
And I felt excited … and so good.
This is how I know my work on my money relationship is actually working.
It was amazing to see myself in the same situation, five years later … and experience the difference five years of money work can make.
Of course, I absolutely still have my challenges and growth edges with money. And I will be working these edges for years go come. I’m not sharing this with you to say, “oh, look at me and how amazing I am at doing this money stuff.”
I’m sharing this with you because it’s important to celebrate our progress. But also because I know:
It can be hard to see our progress when we’re in the thick of it, day-in and day-out.
This journey of growing and healing and deepening your relationship to money? Sometimes, it leaps and bounds forward … but 99% of the time, it’s a slow, steady path, made one baby step at a time.
It can be easy to think you’re not getting anywhere. But trust me: those baby steps add up. And every so often, you’ll have a moment like the one I just had — where you’re in the same situation, several years later — and you can FEEL the difference this work has made.
You might still have big emotions. I know I still do. But the difference is, I have good, solid tools that help me feel confident and clear with my money decisions.
Having the tools to work with our emotions, in the moment, is everything.
So keep using those tools. One Money Date and Body Check-In and baby step at a time. Be patient and persistent.
Because giving this area of life your loving attention? Adds up to big, beautiful transformation.
Even if you can’t see it yet, give it a little time. Life will show you how far you’ve come.
P.S. You’ve been asking, so here we go …
We’re starting to gear up for our Art of Money 2019 earlybird registration in mid-October! So if you’ve been waiting with baited breath for my year-long program (or are just a teensy bit curious if it might be right for you), it’s coming along sooner than you think!
And of course, we’ll be sharing our annual Money Mochas series, oodles of rich, clarity-sparking and peace-inducing content to celebrate our doors opening.
Money Mochas are short, sweet, and deep money teachings. Mini-jolts of financial clarity and love, zapped straight to your inbox. You won’t want to miss it, friends.