How do money and trust know each other?

written by Bari Tessler May 1, 2012
How do money and trust know each other?

What do you trust?

Where is trust in your money relationship?

How do you cultivate trust?

Let me tell you, Trust has been really “up” for me lately. Calling for my attention. Challenging me. Teaching me.

During my recent launch, I had to work my trust muscle pretty hard, as a third of my amazing group coaching students signed up in last 48 hours of enrollment. I met my goals . . . in the final hour. 🙂

Trust is a powerful and often underrated tool in your money journey. When I teach about your money relationship, I include the practical, psychological and spiritual levels. Trust, my friends, is the first component of the spiritual level of our money practice. It’s the foundation upon which your deeper money relationship sits.

(By the way, if you’re looking to dive deep into the spiritual path to money, you’ll want to check out this wonderful – and free – virtual series I’m participating in. Check it out! )

Let’s back up. What is “trust”, really? To start, I consulted Merriam Webster. Here’s what I cut-and-pasted from the dictionary:

trust [truhst]
noun

1. reliance on the integrity, strength, ability, surety, etc., of a person or thing; confidence.
2. confident expectation of something; hope.
3. confidence in the certainty of future payment for property or goods received; credit.
4. a person on whom or thing on which one relies.
5. the condition of one to whom something has been entrusted.

Trust is confidence. It’s Hope. The expectation that things will be okay, and right.

Yes, please. More of that, please!

We need to cultivate trust in our life, and in our money relationship. Indeed, trust is a muscle worth strengthening.

Why do we need Trust in our money relationship?

If you’ve been on the planet for at least a couple decades, you know that life (and money) comes with peaks & valleys, ups & downs, highs & lows, expansion & contraction. Some of us fluctuate within a day, some a week, others a few months, still other a handful of years. We all have our rhythm.

Regardless of your rhythm, we all have our dips when cash flow is stuck, life is uncertain, and we wonder if it will all be okay.

Without trust, these moments in our money story are incredibly more painful. Without trust, we often shut down, numb out, check out and fall into unconsciousness with money with long-term ripple effects.

The trick is to remember in the ups in the downs, and the downs in the ups; to ride the wave of our feelings, and stay current with our experience.

How do you cultivate trust when money is uncertain?

The #1 thing to do (or not do):

Witness.

Invite your feelings to sit right next to you. Whether there is uncertainty, doubt, anxiety, fear, terror – do your best to welcome it into your experience (it’s there whether you welcome it or not, after all).

Watch your feelings. Learn from them.

Body check-ins.

And during these vulnerable times, show up for yourself in the activities that help connect you with your deeper “okayness”, enoughness, and inner peace.

During my recent launch, I was hiking every single day. For me, getting outside in fresh air, in the enormity of the mountains, and the quiet of nature – I’m able to connect with myself, and open up the my next steps. The higher I hiked, the calmer I became and the more I could tap into my trust, inner peace and confidence.

Find your special self-care recipe to decompress, relax, open up, and make space for trust and clarity to swoop in.

Where is trust in your money relationship?

Do you tend to leave trust out of the equation?

This can look like obsessively checking your numbers, feeling frantic, hanging out in your “left brain” only.

Or, it may show up in the ways you beat yourself up: “I suck at money. I’m a failure in money management.” Stop it! 🙂 Let your trust and self-love muscles work a bit. “I can do this, I can learn this, I am smart enough – I’m enough.”

On the flip side, know that “trust” can become a crutch in your money relationship.

Some of us can get so committed to trusting the flow that we are without ground, without systems, without the hustle that is sometimes asked of us. I call this “magical bookkeeping” as opposed to “conscious bookkeeping”. Don’t get me wrong – I love magic, but not at the expense of consciousness.

Take a moment now to breathe in these questions:

  • Where are you with trust?
  • Do you trust your relationship with money?
  • Do you need to add in more trust? Do you need to grow this more?
  • Rather, do you need to add in more clarity, systems and action? Are you ready to nurture a new skill set? (This “outer” work often creates more confidence and trust for you when you’re in need of ground and foundation in your money relationsip)

What ingredient does your “money relationship soup” need more of? What can you add? And how are you going to do it?

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