Bari Tessler
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  • Home
  • About
    • VALUES STATEMENT + BACKGROUND
  • Books
  • Financial Therapy
  • AOM Program
  • Media
  • Mentor Program
  • Contact

Bari Tessler

FINANCIAL THERAPIST, AUTHOR & FOUNDER OF THE ART OF MONEY

Needs vs. Wants

written by Ali Willoughbhy June 1, 2016

Needs vs. Wants

Needs vs. Wants was last modified: June 1st, 2016 by Ali Willoughbhy
Ali Willoughbhy

It's Friday and I'm taking a moment to appreciate It's Friday and I'm taking a moment to appreciate the week and then I'll head into rest. I had 4 podcast interviews this week which is a lot for me. I also had a great mentor call where we talked about boundaries...internal, external, related to money, to our relationships and to our practices. I'll share some of my thoughts on boundaries in a newsletter next week. I've been wanting to do this for some time. There were also some big health and parenting meetings and discussions this week. Plus some pre-spring cleaning and I'm feeling better in my mind-body again and less puffy and foggy. I'd say overall a solid week with some good and some hard but I was able to stay mostly grounded throughout it all. I like to have some end-of-the week ritual where i sit in appreciations and really let it all settle and sink in. There is always more to do on the horizon but it's important to pause and appreciate the full week and all that happened. Now its time to step into a rest and a sabbath (my own version). Shabbat Shalom friends. #selfie #mom #financialtherapist
Your Body Has a Lot to Say about Money Even if y Your Body Has a Lot to Say about Money Even if you are completely unaware of your personal money story, your body knows it well. Your body has been there for every formative money experience you’ve ever had. Your body holds every money belief you’ve ever learned or acquired, every heartfelt money emotion, from shame and anxiety to confidence and joy, and everything in between. Your money experiences and money emotions are rooted in your body. Your body knows. It remembers, even when you don’t. This is why you must bring your body to your money work. Because it’s already there, waiting with precious wisdom for your awareness and compassion. Because when you bring body-based practices to your money work, you ground yourself in the present moment and cultivate a sense of inner safety. You learn to respond to your thoughts, feelings, and experiences with self-compassion and gentle curiosity. You practice bringing loving awareness to your wounds and tender places. And you learn to sit with them, to work through them, and you begin to heal them. This is why somatic-based financial therapy is so important. Because when you learn to tune into your body, you can feel into what you need to feel supported and resourced, even when you can’t find the words. Because learning to check in with your body and to listen to what it has to say teaches you what you need to feel safe and secure. So that even in challenging money moments when your nervous system says that you need to fight, flee, or freeze you have the tools and understanding you need to cope, to self-soothe, and move forward. Because learning to trust the wisdom of your body is an exercise in trusting yourself and choosing to honor your own pace and timing. This is what intimately authentic, personally transformative money work looks like. Because so much of this money journey is really How to Be a Human 101: How to be present in our bodies and in the moment. ​How to name, feel, understand, and work through our emotions. How to cope with unexpected life and money challenges. Your body knows how and is just waiting to show you the way. To read the full piece, go to my blog - link in profile.
Hi there, did you know I have a podcast?! I do and Hi there, did you know I have a podcast?! I do and there are 80 episodes up there for you to enjoy. Some of the episodes are longer where I interview a fellow therapist or financial professional on all sorts of money related topics ie: What to do in cash flow dips to how to heal earning issues to social justice investing. Other episodes are short where I share little teachings on My favorite somatic tools and Ten things your Financial Therapist wants you to know. I've been taking a little break from interviewing others because I'm teaching more in my programs. Also I'm being interviewed a lot on other people's podcast right now. So, if you want to dive into my somatic-based financial therapy right now, this is a great free way to do that. Bring me along while walking or cleaning the house or whenever you listen to your podcasts! You can find my Art of Money podcast on itunes, spotify, google and all the places. Also link to my podcast is in my profile. #podcast #podcastersofinstagram #financialtherapy #financialtherapist #somatictherapy #traumainformed #therapistsofinstagram #author #financialhealth #financialwellness #financialcoach #moneyhealing
my new bookshelf 🧡 #justread #booklover #paper my new bookshelf 🧡 #justread #booklover #paperbooksforever
Just cracking myself up with the glasses on the gl Just cracking myself up with the glasses on the glasses. One of my favorite comedic clips is from a woman impersonating therapists with all our glasses upon glasses and shawls upon shawls. But hey, I just finished my #1 interview out of 17 that got scheduled after I posted that little request on social asking who wanted to interview me. I'm so excited for all of them and will be doing 3 months of a lot of talking and sharing my somatic-based financial therapy work with more good folks. Thank you! I'll certainly share my favorites with you all. #podcast #podcastersofinstagram #therapistsofinstagram #somatictherapist #financialtherapist #authorsofinstagram #author #selfie
You are not behind in life or with money. Whereve You are not behind in life or with money. Wherever this finds you in your money journey, I want to remind you that there is nowhere else you “should” be. Sometimes, as we navigate the ebbs and flows of life and money, we pick up expectations that aren’t ours to carry. We compare our homes, our careers, how “successful” or how “good” with money we are to our friends, family, peers, and colleagues, and we find ourselves lacking. In the midst of comparison, you lose sight of the fact that each one of us arrives at significant milestones at different points in our lives. When you find yourself in those vulnerable moments, when your inner critic whispers that they are ahead and you are falling behind– Because you don’t own your own home. Because you’re still paying off that student loan from your 20s. Because you don’t have the same resources or investment portfolio. Because you’re navigating an unexpected money challenge or a big life transition. No matter what your inner critic says after that “because,” I need you to know it is a lie. No matter how old you are. No matter how long you’ve been doing your own personal money work. No matter how much money you do or do not make. Life and money milestones look, and feel, and mean different things to every one of us. We arrive at them in different ways, from different perspectives, and different paths, each of us on our own journey, carrying our own hopes, fears, values, and ideals along the way. What a profoundly beautiful thing. No, you are not behind. You are a different character in a different chapter of an entirely different book, a narrative woven of your own strengths, challenges, experiences, and dreams. You are writing your own heartfelt, soul-deep money story of hope and healing, growth and discovery, self-compassion and understanding, love and trust. Your money journey is not a competition or a race. There is no timer running in the background. No rankings. No score. No finish line. You can let go of the very idea of “falling behind,” “moving too slow,” or “needing to keep up” now. Thank them for teaching you to honor your own rhythm, trust your own pace and write your own story.
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Amazing photos by Danielle Cohen.
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